Canine Chum Pillows

"Could you read me a dog-food label before bedtime?"

'That was fun!'

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

"Bad dog."

Text Culture

"Oooooh....a western wear dog cone. Sexy!"

"I have spirit, yes I do. I have spirit, how 'bout you?"

'I'll bet you taught him that!'

"It's nice to be wanted."

'How many times have I told you to stay out of the cemetery?'

"Well I got a dog because I wanted to spend more time brushing hair off my clothes, and picking up poop."

'No, Mrs. Dudley! If there's a bone in a chair, that means it's reserved for Marmaduke!'

'Don't forget to talk about their dog!'

Friendship.

That's what I call a well trained dog!!

Hang Time Fido

Man reacts to being goosed. Caption: The secret work of Doberman Pinschers

'You sure picked a great place to have kittens.'

"Don't think of them as fleas. Think of them as your entourage!"

"Remember... the cork. You're supposed to smell the cork!"

'Quick! 'Tushy to the ground' stance!'

'I like you, you've got balls.'

"You know, during these debates there's something that all too often gets ignored."

"I think the dog want's to stay in tonight, Jennifer!"

Dog, dressed as vet, is about to give cat lethal injection. Cat owner says: 'Terminal? I hope you don't mind if I get a second opinion.'

'We're like the canine unit, only tougher. Instead of dogs we use big, bad wolves.'

"There, that ought to hold you."

Spot's favorite game is "hard to pet".

Coming out as a Conversationalist.

"My master got my new tags. Now I've got collar ID!"

"...Perhaps he's detecting a ghostly presence. . !!"

"I'm working on finding a healthier alternative to sniffing butts."

"Wait - you get excited when the humans come hom? Dude, you've been watching too many dog shows."

"It's a mug's game!"

"I'm more of a dog person. Why?"