Candlelit Dinner Critic Pillows

"Darling, you never let me see the side of you that pays."

"I'm just saying. This would be even MORE romantic if we couldn't see in the dark."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"They haven't mated yet, but I think we're getting close."

'And I love you too, darling, but there's the lust to think of.'

'How wonderful, playing our song - astronauts, fly me to the moon.'

Heart to heart talk.

At a secluded, candle-lit dinner, love rears its ugly head.

Honey are you in the mood to fleece a cow tonight

Sorry, I can't talk right now, I'm giving my baby a bottle.

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

"This is all very romantic, but I can't see my fork."

Suddenly it occurred to Justin that rose petals might have been more romantic.

"Thanks, I knew I could count on you to turn my problem into something way worse that happened to you."

Valentine's Day calls for a romantic candlelight dinner and soft music. Then a trip back to my place for some heavy groping and groaning.

Earth Hour will show our leaders the light about saving the planet by keeping everyone in the dark...

"God, I hate theme dinners."

'There's nothing romantic about not being able to mend a fuse at your age!'

'Why don't you stop moaning, and be grateful that mother was kind enough to invite us around for a special halloween supper!'

The Last Dinner

'Isn't this romantic?'

'The full moon is so romantic, isn't it?'

'You have to admit this would be more romantic if we couldn't see in the dark.'

Candlelit dinner.

"What are you doing?!"

'What a wonderful evening, Chuck - candlelight, soft music and my favorite feed.'

"This place caters to workaholics."

Mousetrap: 'How was your dining experience?'

"Darling, you're going to have to text our son to ask if he wants some potatoes."

'The last candlelit supper we had was when they cut the power off.'

"What's the occasion? Candles, wine, that fancy dress? It's not like today's our anniv....oops!"

Give Up Your TV

"I think I'll have extra droppings on my pizza"