Candlelit Comedy Enthusiast Pillows

"I'm recently separated from my significant other half."

Edison: The Early Years,

"I'm just saying. This would be even MORE romantic if we couldn't see in the dark."

Hildegard von Bingen

'And I love you too, darling, but there's the lust to think of.'

Signs of Aging: Light headedness, shortening, waxy skin, burn out and hot flashes.

'Your night writing book, madam.'

"Darling, you never let me see the side of you that pays."

At a secluded, candle-lit dinner, love rears its ugly head.

'You know what would be really romantic? If, just for once, you sat at the tap end.'

Prison Romance.

The Fuse

"I just love candle-lit dinners."

Suddenly it occurred to Justin that rose petals might have been more romantic.

Nocturne

'With our romantic candlelight dinner, I'm obligated to include a safe-sex warning.'

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

"Lost all track fo time with you. 93 unread messages!"

'There's nothing more romantic than candle light when it hides the dirty dishes.'

'There's nothing romantic about not being able to mend a fuse at your age!'

'I called the electric company and told them not to hurry to restore power.'

Candle Size

Valentine's Day calls for a romantic candlelight dinner and soft music. Then a trip back to my place for some heavy groping and groaning.

'Shhhhh...He's preparing for the holiday season.'

' Well..She did it to me again.'

...I'm here at the gruesome scene now. Yes, what began as a candlelight vigil,ended in mass tragedy when the thousands of moths in attendance became inexplicably drawn to each other's flames.

'Isn't this romantic?'

Candlelight dinner? Oh, Edgar - how romantic. You must've driven around hours.

Happy Holidays: Peace children.

"Hey - are those scented candles???"

'It's not a romantic touch, it's a power cut.'

A man climbs a tree to try to blow out the sun.

'You have to admit this would be more romantic if we couldn't see in the dark.'

All Organic Pork: "Naturally smoked bacon my ass."

Acme Candles - In case of fire, break glass.