Campus Roamer Gifts

"All my college books are electronic textbooks, so my backpack weighs less now than it did when I was in elementary school."

Continuing education.

'I'm supposed to take a geography test and I can't find the right room!'

"Oh, this old thing?"

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

Congratulations! All that cramming paid off.

'Our goal is to stress di-versity while remaining a uni-versity.'

'Of course, I'm argumentative.. I'm PRE-LAW, for goodness sake!'

"The Wi-Fi password is publish 'publish or perish'."

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

"That's you nomad's answer to everything...ROAD TRIP!"

Safe spaces?

A man sitting in the grass reading

'He's going to college, but he doesn't have an exit strategy.'

"He walked in, said he was a visiting scholar, and made himself at home."

A sailor in his little yacht bobbing on the waves

A statue dedicated to "The Unknown Academic Infighter" stands outside a college campus.

"I wish that life was as logical as Algebra."

'What did you learn at university today?'

'I don't feel at home on the range.'

Lacks Structure and Meaning

Universidad

Sheep with its wool unwinding because it's snagged on a tree

"Be careful, dear. People tend to lose control when faced with the newfound freedom of their first year of tenure."

'Well, Gosh...! How did you know I was an incoming freshman...?'

Are you really here?

"I've spent more sending my son on college campus tours than I did getting my degree."

Campus Map: Philosophy Department

"Today we're filling out mock college applications."

This house believes that "No Platforming" is not an attack on free speech.

Gone Lecturin'

You're in the Engineering Quad, Just Back Away Slowly and Find the Humanities Quad.