Campfire Troubadour Gifts

"Yep, I agree: It's pure torture when he plays his harmonica around the campfire..."

The No No No's

Harsh Mellows.

"This is a tune about going off the grid and getting back to nature."

Children have their campsite ruined by an assortment of farm animals.

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

"This next song is about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

Singer in a boat disturbing the fish.

Whatever!

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

"I'll make a deal with you! If you stop singing Row, Row, Row Your Boat, I'll help you finish your requirements!"

"Woke up this morning, forgot my apple id..."

'It's not flying I'm afraid of -- it's driving to the airport!'

City & Western.

"This jury finds the accused not guilty provided he tells us where he has hidden the money."

"I couldn't make a fire, but after rubbing sticks so long, I'm not cold anymore!"

"Oh goodie, pigs in a blanket."

The train on the musical line

'Would you mind blowing into this bag Sir?'

Gypsy busker

"We've decided to try role-swapping."

"Oh, I always let Howard stuff the turkey....he was a gynecologist you know!"

'This is the dawning of the age of asparagus...!'

"Oh, well. Guess I'll have to unpack my accordion."

All's well that ends well

"I like sad songs."

'What difference does it make - all roads lead to Rome!'

"I'm afraid a computer tech is going to have to be prematurely taken."

'I'm going to be late dear, the traffic's a mess.'

'I got the ain't nobody texting me blues...'

Smoke signals

'Twitter is throwing open the whole world of libel to a radical rethink...'

'Of all the stalls in all the ablution block in all the camping grounds in the world, I had to walk into his.'

"Of course there are termites in the basement - they're our kids."

"Darling - remind me again - which country are we in?"