Campfire Crafters T-Shirts

Melting snowman roasting marshmallow on open fire.

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

Holiday Supplies

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

'Dad! Dad! Dad!!. . . We lost our signal.'

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

Pan Extension Chord

A marshmallow? Oh, no, thank you, I'm good.

"Can we set the flame to a medium high?"

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

Roasting the Moneybox

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

"I said, 'Fetch Chardonnay,' not 'Riesling.'"

"Yes, we're stranded here... but think how healthier we are eating nothing but fish!"

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

"I'm not a total vegetarian, sometimes I like a bit of buffalo."

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

Flash Cuisine

"This one's really scary. It's about what's happening to my 401k."

Creepy Camp Stories.

"You were right, Louis. . . I was cold before, but now it's warm and toasty."

Cannibal recipes.

Pizza Rescue.

"Well, they look friendly enough."