Called-off Wedding Gifts

"The wedding went off without a hitch."

"Yes, I called off our wedding. Didn't you get my inter-office memo?"

"And where exactly is Timbuktu?"

You're my Mona Lisa.

Demure lady with gloves

Lesbian civil partnership.

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

When Ted and Nancy would dance, it was as if they were the only couple on the floor....

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

'Oh my God. I love it!'

"You may now kiss the bride..."

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"You're the lid to my pot."

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

A heart shaped cake

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

'Okay.. what the hell.'

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

Red Letter Days - A declaration of love in public

We'll have Manhattans...

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

"I feel we haven't moved beyond parallel play."

"Look! I'm going to be a customer!"

Wedding Day Itinerary.