Cafeteria Conversationalist T-Shirts

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'Oh him, that's mosquito man... he's annoying alright, but pretty harmless as far as super villains go.'

We need a new eco project. Ok. Let's get locally grown food into the school cafeteria. What's our strategy? We can start with the potatoes. I'll make the poster. We want home fries.

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

Cafe Burns.

Raphnrrf? Raphnrrf? Umpha? Frfee? Maamr? Pick.

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

"It's a pumpkin spice latte pie latte."

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

'Is that the smell of fear? Or is it just Meatloaf Monday in the cafeteria?'

'We like bright, new employees who aren't afraid to take some risks. By the way... how are those clam fritters?'

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

"I didn't realize there was so many different kinds of vegetables!"

"Would you buy the apple pie for me? I'm on the 'No You Don't!' Diet."

"I don'y know about you guys, but I don't feel like I've lost one goddamn bit of my feminity."

"I didn't know they could make so many entrees with vegetables!"

'I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.' (chef shaking chicken).

"I'll have the 'All you can eat from the menu, the kitchen, and the dumpster' special."

"I tried to hire a hamburger fry cook from a fast food joint for our cafeteria but he wouldn't take the cut in pay."

Yeah, I woke up as a roach because I was so full of existential dread – Why did you wake up as a dung beetle?

Vending machines: Caffeine, Sugar and Carbs.

"My depression is currently being treated with a combination of prescription medication and low-fat frozen yogurt."

"Hi Mike, how's the Leprosy research going?"

"Herbert, don't! This is a gourmet coffee shop! You order instant de-caf and there's going to be trouble!"

Man from 'Environmental Health visits a caf� run by bugs

"When you say you love your life, should I be happy for you?"

"Don't think you can just put the on the costume and replace Jeff."

"They love me...they really, really love me!"

Biocafeteraologist

"Oh yes, I proudly served."

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

"The sourdough starter says it still believes Covid was a hoax."

"I prefer the term 'barista.'"

"We're still negotiating. I want a six-figure starting salary and they don't want to hire me."