Cafe Cashiers T-Shirts

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

Today's special... donuts.

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

"Our new automated workers need a little fine tuning, but they're coming along..."

'Let's try this church. They welcome all denominations!'

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

Not much money, glory, or praise

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

Fries and kids

National Coffee Day

"It's a pumpkin spice latte pie latte."

'Any chance of a ploughman's?'

'I love it when you talk big bucks, Mr. Williams.'

'I'm a purist. I don't take anything in my Vanilla Mocha Dulce Latte.'

'My phone number, Social Security number and Zip Code, just to buy gum? They didn't ask me that many questions when I joined the army.'

A sign outside a bookstore reads: "Meet the people in the bookstore cafe staring at their laptops 2-4 p.m."

Self-Checkout.

'Oh, hello Dave. Would you like that in untraceable, used notes, like last time?'

'Well you checked my £20 note so I'm checking the change you gave me!'

"The checkout clerk will now testily remind you to press 'ok'."

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

60 minutes I.Q. test - pick the counterfeit.

'I applied the instant rebate and the returning customer loyalty reward, so that comes to fifty cents.'

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

'They are poached eggs, sir -- we grabbed them when the chicken wasn't looking!'

Fries with that Burgers: 'I lost my job to robot in Japan.'

Alf's Cafe - Egg, Bacon and Tomato Plate, Catering Pack.