Café Explorer T-Shirts

"... Wine list? No, we don't have a wine list! Perhaps I can get sir something from the vending machine?"

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

Restaurant: 'Out to Lunch'.

Spook cafe special meal.

'Why chocolate pudding to start?' - 'To help deaden your appetite.'

'Steak and microchips, please.'

'Let's try this place...I've heard the service is really slow.'

'William and I dug up this little place just last week!'

"There you go bra. Double flat white and homage to Rothko's Seagram series."

'Hi, I'm Leo. How's the food here?'

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

Coffee Date

"Two non-fat lattes and a decaf flat white, please."

Next coffee shop...50m

"We have a small menu..."

Cafe Momus from La Boheme

"Oh, I hate the taste. It's the ritual I adore."

A group of people sit in a coffee shop.

High Street Coffee Houses.

'Hey let's see what 'Aroma Lattes' is like, Jill! I've heard the coffee here IS to die for!'

Lina's Gourmet Coffee Ship: Longer Hours - Open Latte.

Marx & Hegel Buy a Bagel.

Vegetarian Special: Gingerbread Men.

Countervailing Clichés.

'...and one 'death by chocolate', Sir.'

Trouble brewing down at the local cafe: 'Gimme the chef's salad!' 'Oh eh, well I'll have the shepherd's pie.'

Latte Art

"I'm assuming this coffee date covers an extension of our friendship for at least a year."

"I've decided to take your advice and try something other than tea."

What are the ingredients in your oatmeal? Ingredients? Like what's in it? Yeah. Exactly. No need to shout. Sorry, thought I was just talking. Um, we sprinkle on raisins and walnuts, mix in a dollop of honey. If you want, we can add cream. Not what I'm getting at. I'm wondering what it's got in it. If you get my drift. Sorry, can you speak up? Does it have anything that could help, y'know, with the processing? Processing? The production. Internal combustion. Shooting out the system. Cleaning the

Listen to this review of the caf

"Sorry for the delay -- your power toast has become all-powerful."

Two people are sat in a cold café having hot chocolate.

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf