Cable Conqueror Mugs

"Must get a longer cable."

'We can't rearrange the furniture...I'll never get this mess hooked up again!'

Telephone companies fighting on a 'Fiber optic' cable

"Officer, my husband went back there last night to hook up a DVR... and I haven't seen him since!"

Rage.

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

A woman wearing a skin sitting behind a desk with a nameplate that reads "Sheena, Queen of the corporate jungle."

Second lifeReal life.

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

Why am I running?

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

'Of course, the toll on my personal life has been enormous.'

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"I believe he was the victim of a hostile takeover."

Gary Basks in the glow of a fifteen-minute window with no empty cardboard boxes in the house.

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

'...and what's more, my databank has more data than your databank.'

Crop duster wanted.

"Jones is our go-to-thankless-job-guy!"

'No good deed goes unpunished around here.'

"I advise a slow, steady stream of lawsuits to weaken your enemies resistance. We call it time release litigation."

'He works in Acquisitions.'

Access Denied!

"How was your day?"

'I sent an employee to a motivational seminar once. He came back and took my job.'

"I see myself rising through the ranks of the organization until midlife, when I will most likely hit a wall and go screaming through the door."

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

'Buzz Off! I'm busy!'

'The question before us is: 'do we pounce on Acme industries and gobble them up and savage them, or do we roll over like a bunch of spineless pussycats and let Acme take us over?'

'I've had tight deadlines, if that's what you mean by performing well under pressure.'

CEO's office in a safe.