C-span Enthusiasts Gifts

'Insomnia, eh? -- Drink a glass of warm milk and watch some C-Span.'

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

Public Relations: Reputations cleaned and repaired

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

'Your cat scan looks fine, your pet scan looks fine, your MRI looks fine, but your insurance reimbursement doesn't look fine.'

Music Hall Dancers

"Remember, if we get split up, take the A to 42nd, transfer to the Brooklyn bound 2, get off at Eastern parkway and buy a ticket for the Brooklyn Museum and make sure to tell them you're under three."

Subway Thrillers

'It was only a five minute job. Not worth changing out of his best clothes for'

'People who can read Venn diagrams...'

Boy squashed under lawn roller.

'There's more information available now than ever before. I can only block out so much of it.'

'Go ahead,ask me which way is north.'

'Yes, It's in that direction.'

"Here are today's political campaign numbers: spin is up 10%, truth is down 5%, flip flops up 20%..."

Google Magazine

Gloria's life had been uneventful - until her 40th birthday, when her arms changed into swans.

'What does the Scout manual say about this situation?'

Cowpunk

The History of Anti-stick

"How cute! Our technician photo-bombed your X-ray!"

Pirate Paddle Boat.

Odile

'The part of your brain you used to diagnose what is wrong with you is what is wrong with you.'

'That's Kevin Hurley. He wants us to know he's an Eagle Scout.'

"I have the results of your PET scan and your CT scan. You are not claustrophobic."

Metro North Entrance: Closed because it's broken.

"F train coming, Kemosabe - two maybe three stops away."

Man lost in a maze while his wife waits outside

'I have to take this call right now. Just go on across the street and text me so I'll know you made it okay.'

Congress, as seen on C Span.

Diddly

Summer feet.

"And talk about stuck-up! Just because Tchaikovsky and Hans Christian Andersen knew her family. . ."

'Have you seen pictures of those redwood trees with holes big enough for cars to drive through?'