Butler Admiration Pillows

"Regift the bicycle, Charles, but put this in my Panama pile."

Pirate

'Alas, poor Yorick, I knew you well. But dude, you're creeping me out, so I gotta un-friend you!'

Reginald Bunthorne

'There's no art to the mind's construction on Facebook, Macbeth.'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'Guess who just graduated cum laude from Sunnydale Obedience School?'

'Pigs feet, sir?' 'Are they pickled?'

'The Ambassador will not be pleased, Madame.'

"I say we move on to dessert."

Shakespeare's Brain

"Me, I think Master and Mistress are incompetent: why else would they need a butler, 3 maids, 2 cooks, 5 gardeners, a pool boy and 2 personal assistants?"

'Not gruel, stupid! -- I said find the GRAIL!'

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

Sir Desmond Murgatroyd

"I don't care what job you want, Bagshaw, for God's sake dress for the job you have!"

The Royal Wii

'Look Chaucer, there goes that rotten plagiarist Shakespeare again!'

"Will she know what this is in reference to?"

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

"Whatever is quickest - I'm starving!"

'My Alfa Romeo, My Alfa Romeo, where for art thou?'

Culinary Culture.

'The butler did it.'

'Ah, Reeves - it's lonely on top!'

'Doctor, one placebo or two with your tea?'

"Tell him I can still hear him chewing."

Hit me with that crazy cha cha again, James!

Trustworthy Authority.

Now that, my dear James, is what I call a Dog's Breakfast...

Gentleman discovering that his servants have been eating most of his good meat

'New money or old money?'

Iron clad sailors

Recollections of a Retired Butler

Royal Picnic