Business Transformation Gifts

'All those who think change is good, say aye...'

'We had a leveraged buyout today, and I was the fulcrum!'

"I'm not looking forward to telling the 300 salesmen we're going to start selling on the internet."

Man sees eatery, 'Mom's Cyber Cafe', below it reads, 'Formerly Mom's Diner'.

'I need a change in my life. From now on it's all wheeling and no dealing'

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

Looks like another day in which. . . I have to run the world, the country, the business and the household!!!

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

"Gentlemen, I'm pleased to say the firm is perfectly positioned to avoid chapter eleven and still be in existence this time next year."

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

The MBA Draft

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

'And I'm happy to say, that since the merger...'

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

'As our new company logo, I'm not quite sure it's sending out the right message.'

"You're just the man we're looking for. Come around to this side of the desk, and I'll gather up my things and get the heck out of here."

'The staff is being reduced. The exit strategy will be explained at a meeting to be held, after work, in the parking lot.'

'Don't worry. No one else knows what they are doing either.'