Business Seminar Gifts

"Meanwhile, obsessing about productivity is way up."

'Sometimes it's good to get a different perspective.'

'And remember - failure is not an option...oh, hang on, yes it is.'

"....which brings me to number one: Thinking inside the box."

Economic Conference.

'You can take all the business classes you want, but they can't teach nepotism.'

'I'm what you can't learn at Harvard Business school.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

How leaders fail

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

Business meeting, CEO is dressed strangely as he asks: 'Any questions?'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

'The sunglasses idea would have worked if you hadn't started snoring.'

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

"My report to the board was perfect. They did not understand a word of it and now think I'm smarter than them."

'Gentlemen, I've been authorized to sweeten the offer.'

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

A business that thinks alike...sinks alike.

'We have a strict don't-ask-don't-tell policy for salaries.'

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'

"He thought this would illustrate the company hierarchy more clearly than the organizational chart."