Business Schmoozer T-Shirts

Bob tried networking – and crashed it.

"Just remember if we don't enjoy it we can claim it as a tax-deductible business meeting..."

I love it when you speak Wall Streetese. Say 'to the upside' for me.

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

Finger on the Z Key

Lord Avariss - Captain of Industry

I have decided that all future board meetings will be held before lunch.

'It's not just a job. It's about being part of something bigger than yourself.'

'He struggles with having to do his own marketing.'

What a Guy! The Tops! - "He likes to make his clients feel important."

'I gained many useful leads, renewed relationships with various potential customers and established a number of contacts...'

"He's in a high stake poker game right now."

I was awake all last night. Me, too. I'm exhausted. Ditto!! Thank heavens for work. And for today's staff meeting! It's the only place I can sleep!

'Clown-noser.'

"She's a great networker. One drink and she's on schmooze control."

'Fantastic meeting! . . . Just fantastic. Why don't I have my weasels call your weasels.'

'I wouldn't say he walks the walk, but he does crawl the crawl.'

'I want you to meet a Corporate Chieftan who's fall of himself.'

"This is all very boring..."

Tesco Litigation Dept - 'They're suing me for going to Sainsburys.'

'Tell me, exactly which of my points is 'moot'?'

I'll have my people get in touch with your people.

"Stan baby, Dave baby here."

"Baldo and Gracie have cleaned their rooms...they've scrubbed the kitchen...and the bathroom is spotless. Yes, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas."

'Strange how more comfortable I feel, speaking through a puppet!'

Bar. "Unwind"? I thought you were solar-powered.

"We'd better talk some business, or else I can't claim this on expenses."

Meeting with pillows provided

Professional Couples

"I'm only concerned with the neighborhood economy right now."

'Can I take your lower orders?'

'So you can't sleep.'

It's time to get up. Call me later and we'll do lunch. The Schmooze Alarm.