Business Presentations Gifts

"Which brings us to my next point."

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

"...and this chart shows people clearly prefer bar graphs to pie charts."

"Any questions?"

"But you said we had to prepare an 'Elevator Pitch'..."

'You're certainly seeing the big picture.'

Prompter malfunction. You're on your own.

'This pie chart clearly demonstrates the distain with which most people regard pie charts.'

"I always say there's no such thing as a stupid question, but..."

'I practice my presentation before tomorrow's meeting and it gets him right to sleep.'

"Let me now direct your attention to the pepperoni."

'Any questions?'

"I seem to have forgotten what I was going to say...please...hold the applause!"

'And this is after the creation of a Special Effects Department.'

"Sorry, Roger. The old laser pointer seems to be acting up again!"

"I said I wanted the big picture. This is hardly even a supporting feature. It isn't even the cartoon short."

"Do your thing, Phil...lull them into submission."

"So considering the data related to Blah! Blah! Receivables taking into account offshore tax deductibles before blah...."

"Did I say 'Yada Yada Yada?' My mistake! This is the 'Badda-Bing, Badda-Boom' portion of my presentation!"

"And if someone dares to yawn during your presentation, this pointer easily transforms from a laser to a taser!"

"When I said tart up the presentation, I meant the slides..."

"In preparation for his appearance before the foundation board, Rodney fine-tunes his song and dance."

"An occasional heads up would be nice."

"I asked Bill to accompany this presentation with something in a haunting minor key."

Boy, this cold medicine works great.

'He should have planned his wardrobe this morning - his Flies undone...'

He got a little emotional before big presentations.

"I hate it when you bring your work home with you!"

'Watch closely as I point. It's all in the wrist.'

"How about a round of applause for our graphics department for enhancing our slide into oblivion."

'Do your thing, Phil...lull them into submission.'

Exchange Fund

"....which brings me to number one: Thinking inside the box."

"Larry picks up a couple of PowerPoint Guards at the trade deadline."