Business Lunch Critic Gifts

'That lunch didn't agree with me - it wasn't tax deductable.'

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

'This is a business lunch, Lowden. So, don't even think about enjoying yourself.'

"I'll tell you what I'm looking for! I'm looking for a yes man, Jenson. Do you think you could fit that bill?"

"They got me for pillaging. How about you?"

"The biggest mystery in my life is whether I get a peanut butter and jelly or a tuna fish sandwich!"

'So this is the company's new mission statement.'

"So we all agree to reduce our company motto to 'It was the least we could do'?"

"Recent research has yielded some frightening results...It turns out we are a business team held forever on a presentation chart, locked away in a supply closet."

'One businessman's lunch-on-the-rocks and one businessman's special straight-up.'

"We're looking for people to fire."

"You know, maybe he's not the small-business man he claims to be."

"My name is Bob and I'm looking for a 'Yesirree' man."

Food van driving through an office.

Rat Race Resources.

'On the agenda for this meeting is sick leave...'

NOW HIRING SECRETARY, 'Oh, what the heck -- typing is overrated anyway.'

Landing That Tough Account

'You deserve a bonus, but of course we can't give you one. Instead, we offer a pat on the back and five atta boys.'

'The new role will involve some EXTRA responsibilities...of course you'll appreciate that there won't be any extra funding...It's a role for which you are uniquely qualified!'

'One businessman's lunch and one lackey's lunch.'

"I like the Businessman's Special. The fortune cookies all have stock futures in them."

"I'm looking for someone who's qualified to cover my mistakes."

We have the businessman's lunch which is �4.95 and the successful businessman's lunch at �7.50.

'Here's to another great year of sluggish sales, no growth and huge undeserved bonuses.'

"I always find the Contract Attorney's Special amusing. The price is always in extremely fine print."

"Wow, Bill! It sounds like you're developing a real moral streak!"

"We're concerned about morale. It's getting pretty high."

"This memo from upstairs says we can torture the accounting people."

Wow, you're right! Your mom's regurgitated worms are way better than my mom's!

'We'd like to merge two business lunches.'

"Our food supervisor used to be a military cook."

"The Attorney's Lunch—may I hear the warranty again?"

Just remember, don't claim for lunch unless I was with you.

'That's why I love to be the boss - I've got the power to order you to send me useless reports day by day and I've got the freedom not to read the crap!'