Burlesque Fans Gifts

'Over on stage number two is the lovely, succulent, Misty Flatulence!'

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

"Check it out! The big Comic-Con starts this week!"

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

The Stripper

Monster Clown

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

"Your therapy will be a combination of drugs and clowns."

"I can't be sure...I only got a quick look."

Breakfast surreal.

'Sheep striptease'.

"I didn't say he's dying from choking. I said he's killing us with his joking."

'I believe there's an unseen hand behind everything we do.'

Finesse fishing

A high wire act walks over to a bottle of wine.

'You showbiz types can never make intelligent conversation!'

"So. . . how long have people NOT been laughing at you. . . ?"

Leonard Nimoy

"Do you mind?"

Ballerina Boxer,"She's going for a win on pointes."

News of the Day - History, reviewed and corrected by the operatta - 'Come on! Two Chilperies and Agamemnon!

The Chippendales go through airport security.

'Mmmm. How do you get the custard so creamy? You must give me the recipie!'

'I'm sorry, but we're letting all of you go. Your jobs have been outsourced to India.'

'I decided I need something to draw the eye away from my bald patch.'

'Ok lads, this is no laughing matter...!'

"I'm leaving you, Al. And I'm taking my mother and the cats with me." "Laughing on the outside, laughing on the inside."

'Your puppet is suing you for harassment.'

A better way to sweep the floor.... just shuffle!

Wizards Convention: Please Leave Hats Here.

"Okay, I'm intrigued."

"We don't think you're management material."

The Samaritans On A Home Visit...

"Now you're thinking outside the box!"

'This must be your son - I can see the resemblance.'