Bureaucracy Jokester Gifts

"Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing!"

"Sorry, we're running a little behind."

"The post's arrived. You've got a doctor's appointment last week."

'I'm afraid your regular teller is no longer with us, sir -- you'll have to open a new account before you can withdraw anything.'

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

Quality Control

"Wrong window. I’m a sea lion. You need an otter."

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'

"'COST: shedloads, COMPLETION DATE: God knows.' Perhaps you'd care to flesh out some details for us."

"You're allowed to think outside the box, as long as you stay inside the margins."

'Welcome! Highly placed, unidentified administration spokespersons convention.'

'Casual Friday's never caught on in this department.'

"You have a valid social security number, a photo ID, and a credit score. As far as I'm concerned, you exist."

"You're a bureaucrat, Ed. What do you mean you hate paperwork?"

Industrial Injuries Benefit.

"We appreciate your insights Norman but the firm has reached the stage where we need actual ideas."

I might have granted your loan request, if it wasn't written on a beer mat.

Excessive Paperwork

God's Office.

'We're downsizing the Pentagon into a triangle.'

Bureaucratic castle

"To give him credit...normally I think these staff 'consultations' are a complete waste of time...but he's been in his office all morning working on our ideas."

Department of Infrastructure

'I'm pleased to announce the newly-created 'Office of Homepage Security' - to protect against computer hackers.'

'Miss Carruthers, check and see if we have an extradition treaty with Disneyland.'

Before we can rescue you...you need a safety check.

"For our market research, each package needs to be individually marked off and put over there."

Insufficient Postage

Congratulations on winning the Inland Revenue Fiction Award.

The new contract will give you much more power over your future...so here are some guidelines as to how you'll be allowed to use it!'

'I'm sorry, sir, this is the department of Immediate Dissatisfaction. Your appointment is with the Bureau of Eternal Frustration.'

'Of course you don't remember agreeing to see me regarding my time machine. You made the appointment next week.'

A dart board for the Federal Reserve's planning policy?

'We've been looking into absences at our meetings and it turns out that Nigel died in 2006 and Trevor never actually worked here!'

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