Bullying Gifts

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

The Anti-Agent

Computer Room.

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

Fear/Knowledge

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

'The creative process works best with a relaxed brain, so I'm letting my mind wander to let a solution drift in.'

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

Eternal Student.

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

I will study my speling words...

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

The Bookworm

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"Teach yourself what you don't know you don't know."

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"It's no my fault I got a D. The system is broken."

Historical memory is on life support.

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

UK border controls relaxed.

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

"I'll bet all of Albert Einstein's teachers felt like idiots for giving him bad grades too."

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

“It's a tree, sweetie. No need to Google it.”