Bully Banisher Pillows

'The bullies tend to avoid me, so if you become my friend, they'll leave you alone...'

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

I wish you kids would get off your electronics and learn a practical skill. Work with your hands! What does he think we're doing?!! Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap.

"That's an everblue."

"Welcome to Trapeze Talent Inc. If you'd like us to catch you, fill out this form, and we'll get back to you if we're interested."

Shoe Repair and Pest Control.

"Ooh don't stop Bob, the last time you ran your fingers through my hair like this was on our wedding night!"

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"

'You've had enough!'

'I've never done this before.'

Dart player with long darts. 'Look, rules are meant to be broken, aren't they?'

'Pillow too soft?'

"Oh, for heaven's sake. Use the spray!"

'Come out of that cupboard. If you can't stand up to the class bully, who will? After all, you are the Headmaster...?'

Bob takes care of this monster-under-the-bed business once and for all.

Warning.

'Anything I can break has to go.'

"Hahaha! What's wrong Dorky Nerdmire? That's your name isn't it?"

"Remember, son, keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and anyone who says 'Beer me' as far away as possible."

Ah, rain has stopped, now for the good life...

"Stupid bullies. I would try to defend myself – but what if I lose? Who would cover my legal expenses?"

Cut down your own tree.

"You've just raided your last patch!"

"I say it's government-mandated broccoli, and I say the hell with it."

This is a new talking copier, you've pushed the wrong button, mutton head!

Freshman Ronnie Klumpf wisely outfitted himself with a wedgie deterrent system.

School Fights

'I turn them loose in my cave. They're colorful, fun to watch and they eat bugs.'

"I remember when walls weren't so bossy."

"Wait, I just want to kill this fly."

"What are you going to do about it? Call an exterminator?"

"Why are you afraid of bugs? You outweigh the majority of them by 250 pounds."

Smokers not putting their cigarette butts in the bin person so frustrated he puts the smoker in the bin

"To hell with you, too."

"You should've called me sooner!"