Phone Banisher Pillows

Cause phone solicitor's head to explode.

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

I wish you kids would get off your electronics and learn a practical skill. Work with your hands! What does he think we're doing?!! Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap.

"That's an everblue."

'I could text you...I can fax you...I can email you...I could ring you...Lunch?...I can't make it.'

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

"Ooh don't stop Bob, the last time you ran your fingers through my hair like this was on our wedding night!"

Shoe Repair and Pest Control.

"Welcome to Trapeze Talent Inc. If you'd like us to catch you, fill out this form, and we'll get back to you if we're interested."

'You've had enough!'

Even though I'm on the do-not-call-list telemarketers manage to ruin my hibernation again.

'I've never done this before.'

'What part of school don't you understand?', 'The part between the bells ringing.'

'Pillow too soft?'

"Oh, for heaven's sake. Use the spray!"

Bob takes care of this monster-under-the-bed business once and for all.

"Remember, son, keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and anyone who says 'Beer me' as far away as possible."

'Anything I can break has to go.'

'Never fails,,, The second we sit down for dinner,'

Ah, rain has stopped, now for the good life...

Warning.

'I hope you don't want to leave a message - he hates messages.'

"You've just raided your last patch!"

"I say it's government-mandated broccoli, and I say the hell with it."

"I've asked you never to call me during naptime."

"I only wish this was the final notice."

This is a new talking copier, you've pushed the wrong button, mutton head!

'At the sound of the tone, please leave a message.. unless you're trying to sell me something.'

"Wait, I just want to kill this fly."

"What are you going to do about it? Call an exterminator?"

"How many times do I have to tell, you, don't call me at work!"

'I turn them loose in my cave. They're colorful, fun to watch and they eat bugs.'

"No, I'm not interested in a free ski weekend. Please take me off your call list."

"Why are you afraid of bugs? You outweigh the majority of them by 250 pounds."