Phone Banisher Pillows

Cause phone solicitor's head to explode.

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

'I could text you...I can fax you...I can email you...I could ring you...Lunch?...I can't make it.'

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

"Ooh don't stop Bob, the last time you ran your fingers through my hair like this was on our wedding night!"

Even though I'm on the do-not-call-list telemarketers manage to ruin my hibernation again.

'You've had enough!'

'I've never done this before.'

"Oh, for heaven's sake. Use the spray!"

'What part of school don't you understand?', 'The part between the bells ringing.'

Bob takes care of this monster-under-the-bed business once and for all.

'I hope you don't want to leave a message - he hates messages.'

Warning.

Ah, rain has stopped, now for the good life...

'Never fails,,, The second we sit down for dinner,'

'Anything I can break has to go.'

"Remember, son, keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and anyone who says 'Beer me' as far away as possible."

"You've just raided your last patch!"

"I've asked you never to call me during naptime."

"I say it's government-mandated broccoli, and I say the hell with it."

"I only wish this was the final notice."

This is a new talking copier, you've pushed the wrong button, mutton head!

'At the sound of the tone, please leave a message.. unless you're trying to sell me something.'

"Wait, I just want to kill this fly."

"What are you going to do about it? Call an exterminator?"

'I turn them loose in my cave. They're colorful, fun to watch and they eat bugs.'

"How many times do I have to tell, you, don't call me at work!"

"No, I'm not interested in a free ski weekend. Please take me off your call list."

"Why are you afraid of bugs? You outweigh the majority of them by 250 pounds."

Right now, he's in his man cave.'