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"So, who's doing bottom windows and who's doing top?"

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

A man sees a leak in his ceiling and drills a hole in the floor under leak to by pass his apartment.

"Maybe the termite problem should take precedence over the chimney problem."

Sick Building Syndrome

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

Caution signs.

Timber preservation

"Sure, it's a break you can live with... but screw one more socket and you're toast!"

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

Fire door.

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

"Why do I feel like your mother is going to blame this on my cleaning?"

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

'If you could roll up your sleeves, go behind the screen and plaster the wall.'

"Meow...."

Leaf blowers at dawn.

'Doors opening.' - 'Doors closing.' - 'Doors bored now.'

"That pigeon's at it again."

"Prepare to meet thy blower."

"Larry does all his own stunts."

Access Assessments

"...there's honey all over the walls, a weird buzzing noise 24 hours a day and some weird broad at the end of the hall thinks she's the queen!"

"Does the co-op board have any idea when the elevators will be replaced?"

"It's the worst case of Sick Building Syndrome I've ever seen!"

'The Miracles of Suspension.'

'Well... at least we know the basement doesn't leak.'

Man's house has sign reading 'Sod the council'. His neighbour says: 'Frankly, I'm amazed you got planning permission.'

"It's just a hunch, but you may have the power set too high on your pressure washer."

Tub Canyon

Kick me.