Building Code Buff Gifts

What code violations?

'You say it's a boat, I say it's a house, and it's not up to code.'

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

Caution: Construction workers standing around and drinking coffee.

Health and safety notice falling on builder.

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

You're right, it's the house next door that gets the new window.

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

'The buildings are merging.'

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

Showing gardening tools to a tower block.

"Could I have a Tommy Tippee cup for my friend's beer, as he's been using a concrete breaker all day."

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

'Ok, we've rented the whole building ... oops, they just put on another floor.'

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

'Wow. The anti-smoking movement really has been successful.'

'We thought you'd like music during your building inspection.'

"Looks like a tragic accident Chief. Although how he could trip and fall under a road roller beats me."

"Did you have any problems at the design stage?"

'I know the fire's in the kitchen, but that program just irks the hell out of me.'

I need a 10 foot board. That's 70 feet in dog feet.

'When you're right, you're right. When you're wrong, you're fired.'

'Best bit of winter pipe lagging I've seen for ages...unfortunately, that's just the scaffolding.'

'Don't worry - all tall buildings sway a little in the wind.'

'So that's what it's for Ethel. It's somewhere to put their spirit level

'It took you three years to build it. I'll have it down in 15 minutes.'

Scaffolding being put together by glue.

'Bill, you messed up again. You built the second floor on top of the third floor.'

'Office real estate' lifting weights