Budget-conscious Philosophers Gifts

'Actually, the bill is part of your reality therapy.'

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

'Sorry guys... budget cuts !'

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

Financial Eyesight

'My investment club had morphed into a support group.'

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

"Well, if there is life on Mars, how come they haven't asked us for money?"

Right now my brother Al is paying a psychiatrist a hundred bucks an hour to hear his troubles, while I'm drinking beer and telling you mine at happy hour prices. Obviously, Al IS the crazy one.

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

'Well, you're bankrupt, but look on the bright side -- it only cost you eight dollars per transaction!'

Med. Soc Sec. Can we agree on anything to reduce the deficit other than a bake sale?

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

Take one Per Day as Affordable.

"The increase in our budget has allowed you the luxury of a company vehicle. Enjoy."

Pollution and money

Sam's Nation Building

"I want to tell her I love her and let her know I'm careful with money."

'I know you're trying to keep health care costs down - but what kind of life support systems are these?'

Senior Brand Name Medicine Cabinet

'I'm not paying $200 per hour for therapy, so you must be the one who's nuts.'

I used to live payday to payday, now I live payday to three days till payday.

When they said more people were choosing to holiday at home I think they meant in the UK

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

'Private schools are really expensive these days - Why don't you home-school him?'

"I know it's not an antique but it will be when I've finished paying for it."

Very sad piggy bank

"Diversification doesn't mean hiding the money under the mattress, the sofa and 2 chairs!"

'What do I get for £1?'

'The armed forces are having to respond to new kinds of threat.'

"I resent having to pay for my parents 'baby boomer' pensions, pensions that I'll never be able to afford."

'Uncle, we need to up our prices, sand is getting scarce.'

"Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?"

"Why are you typing your own letters?"

"Get used to it...I think we're going to be eating them for a while yet..."