Budget-conscious Philosopher Gifts

'Of course money can't buy you happiness. Not on what you make!'

"We only got six days of funding."

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

'Sorry guys... budget cuts !'

BMA criticises 'Black Hole' of NHS IT spending

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

Financial Eyesight

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

"Well, if there is life on Mars, how come they haven't asked us for money?"

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

Med. Soc Sec. Can we agree on anything to reduce the deficit other than a bake sale?

Right now my brother Al is paying a psychiatrist a hundred bucks an hour to hear his troubles, while I'm drinking beer and telling you mine at happy hour prices. Obviously, Al IS the crazy one.

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

'Well, you're bankrupt, but look on the bright side -- it only cost you eight dollars per transaction!'

Take one Per Day as Affordable.

'Actually, the bill is part of your reality therapy.'

Sam's Nation Building

Pollution and money

"I want to tell her I love her and let her know I'm careful with money."

'I know you're trying to keep health care costs down - but what kind of life support systems are these?'

"I know it's not an antique but it will be when I've finished paying for it."

'Private schools are really expensive these days - Why don't you home-school him?'

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

When they said more people were choosing to holiday at home I think they meant in the UK

'I'm not paying $200 per hour for therapy, so you must be the one who's nuts.'

I used to live payday to payday, now I live payday to three days till payday.

Senior Brand Name Medicine Cabinet

Has somebody taken the staff development and training budget again?"

Very sad piggy bank

'The nice thing about our car is we double its value when we fill it up with gas.'

"Diversification doesn't mean hiding the money under the mattress, the sofa and 2 chairs!"

"Why are you typing your own letters?"

"Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?"

"Get used to it...I think we're going to be eating them for a while yet..."

'The armed forces are having to respond to new kinds of threat.'