Budget Brilliance Gifts

Piggy bank writing an article on 'How to save Money?'

"I need to see your budget proposal."

'On the plus side we've saved money by getting all the numbers on one graph.'

"Can you give me a haircut that says, 'If you mess with my budget I'll rip out your soul, wring it like a dish towel, and drink it from a teacup'?"

'It's cheaper than gas.'

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

Unable to afford scaffolding, Dave ties plungers on his feet to get up a wall.

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

'Bearing in mind I'm a man of few words - how much?'

Smart card.

'Looks like we'll have to break into the piggy bank to find our endowment funding.'

Economy.

Overdraft limit.

'Surely you can manage on your salary!'

Economist!

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'

"Hired! You're just what we need in our budget office!"

'Our expenses have decreased 20 per cent since we started refilling our own ink jet cartridges.'

'Withdrawal symptoms.'

'Wait a minute....!

'Well, well. You made more money last year than you did the year before -- You people never learn, do you?'

"I tried to hire a hamburger fry cook from a fast food joint for our cafeteria but he wouldn't take the cut in pay."

"What I want from you, is a big budget event with a low budget, budget."

Realty. Remember

"As company chairman I'd like to thank you all for participating in the evenings entertainment and saving me �4000."

"I think it's time we cashed in our spare change. We could probably pay off our house."

'I usually take my new clients to nicer places. But my expense account isn't what it used to be.'

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'

'If the best things in life are free, we have too many of the worst things.'

Desk Request

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.

Falling Profits.

"This new budget plan to save us millions has cost us billions! How much to switch back?"

The Accountant Husband