Budgetary Genius Gifts

"As company chairman I'd like to thank you all for participating in the evenings entertainment and saving me �4000."

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

Fuel bill gone through the roof

"Your expense account ain't what it used to be. There's not enough money on your card to cover the $5.35."

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

'Sorry guys... budget cuts !'

Investing your savings

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

'Well I've finished the project on time and on budget!' 'Oh, that means I've given you too much time and too much money!'

Blowing dust off an order book.

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'It's a type of credit card that self destructs when it reaches the limit I've set for you.'

"No, unfortunately I won't be raising your debt ceiling."

"His department suffered the death of a thousand cuts."

'The diet books really worked for me...I bought so many I couldn't afford any food.'

Realty. Remember

'This charge is for the office visit, this charge is for blood work, and this charge just about pays off the doc's school loan.'

'So, who's first?'

"This new budget plan to save us millions has cost us billions! How much to switch back?"

Easy Budget Terms Are Not That Easy.

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.

'We can't cut out the middle man. With the government in the picture now we are the middle man.'

"Well, if there is life on Mars, how come they haven't asked us for money?"

'Can I help? You bet your bottom dollar I can.'

"I want you to know that the school board is very pleased with your efforts to make this new budget work."

'When we talk about a 'needs' led service. The 'NEED' is to stay in budget!'

"Well, I thought of it as an innovative economic stimulus package, but the jury insisted on calling it securities fraud!"

"Under the new tax plan, do we get it in the neck more or less than under the old tax plan?"

'To save money, Bob started making his own wine. This Chablis, for example, only cost him $329 a bottle.'

Piggy bank writing an article on 'How to save Money?'

"With me it's even worse. I'm still paying off loans from nursery school."