Buddhism Buff Gifts

"Nothing happens next. This is it."

'Make me one with everything.'

Om and Ommer

Buddha's hairstyle creates cravings in a disciple

"Not fair, he's got a bigger cushion."

"Psst! I got mantras. You need a mantra? Mantras right here..."

'You never told me he was a spitting lama.'

'Oh, sorry Dad!'

'It's nice that you just attained enlightenment, but you're not supposed to yell 'Oo-RAH!''

'Enlightenment does that to some people.'

'The trouble is, once you've attained enlightenment, it's all downhill.'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

'Are you sure you want to go through with this? -- some people think enlightenment is overrated.'

"I spy with my mind's eye..."

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Jean-Paul Sartre

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink in the wild air." — Ralph Waldo Emerson "Catch tennis balls in the mouth." — Me

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

"But can't I be feared and loved?"

"Nobody ever asked about my mental health."

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

"To paraprase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure with out pain au chocolat."

"But if you cure my hypochondria I won't have any hobbies."

"Personally, I'm a doer."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'Yes, all at once!'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."