Bryophyte Hunter T-Shirts

'He's done his back in doctor, searching for bryophytes!'

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Another Bigfoot sighting...

Fishermen dread the spot where the lures hang heavy from the trees like Spanish moss.

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

Fishing Boat Derby

Lyme Disease Research Lab

"Fanfare for the common man-thing."

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

"My biggest concern is adequate closet space."

Jean Philippe Rameau

'Hon, come quick! I think we have a major computer bug.'

"It's John Paul Yeti."

"She said they were going out back to look for dinosaurs."

"Good night, Al. We still haven't found it."

"Not too big a garden-my wife tires easily!"

"They're willing to throw in their kidneys."

Real estate.

Letting agent on the phone: 'OK, so there's fungus in the bathroom - but on the plus side, it IS organic.'

"I think they're trying to tell us we've stayed to long."

Bigfoot Research Center

"Sssh! - Did you hear a noise??"

'Look, they're slowing down.'

Mortgages up 'Where?'

God: 'Man has dominion over fish...beasts...and germs have dominion over man.'

"There! I heard it again!"

'Want a new house? Time to start groveling again.'

The family tradition lives on: I won the Long Jump and the Triple Jump events...

'Surely there's some other good source of protein out there!'

'I'm on the verge of a major breakthrough, but I'm also at that point where chemistry leaves off and physics begins, so I'll have to drop the whole thing.'

'Hold still, Phil, there's a bug on your hat.'

'The pro said my swing was out of this world.'