Brownnosing Aficionado Gifts

"We're convinced you'll make a lousy senior partner, but you beat everybody else in the brownnosing department."

"WHich one is mine?"

7 brownies worth of exercise.

Destination casinos...

When placed in the hands of the right person on a long vacation, even egg salad could be a deadly weapon.

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

Have Horns Venn

"In honor of your birthday I had your face tattooed to my ass."

"You had me at hell."

"I see, Mr. Pipkins, we're back on the bourbon and smoking through glazed doughnuts."

'Talk about lack of trust! My trainer didn't even bet on me, but I showed him: I won the race!'

'I don't know why babies always want to pull my nose.'

'So, who's not a happy bunny?'

"It would help if you brown-nosed a little more."

"I do a lot for charity but I don't like to talk about it. . ."

"He's in a high stake poker game right now."

Don't you like it, Dad?

Maternity nurse presenting newborn baby with big nose to father with big nose.

I've never seen anyone so confident about a race!

"I expected it to be a lot busier on our opening night."

"FYI, we still practice brown nosing here."

Easter Bunny HQ. United States. If all these states can move up their primaries, why can't I move Easter ahead of Valentine's Day?!

'Alright, alright, you've won your bet: You can lift me with one hand...'

A Good Bet.

"This year I decided to get my hare dyed instead."

"The match fixers are making it a bit obvious."

"I'm enrolled in a total immersion wine class."

"Your best bet is photoshop."

'Bless you!'

'Eww! Gross! You smell really good. Have you been in the rose garden again?'

'Look at'em... They're HUGE.'

The rivalry between the Hamptons and Cape Code spills over.

Jazz hummingbird

"Regift the bicycle, Charles, but put this in my Panama pile."

-You seem certain he'll win the second race! -Yes, because he's in the FIRST race!