Breakroom Zen Master Gifts

"I couldn't retire. I wouldn't know what to do with myself."

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

Zenemies.

Yoga.

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

After years of intense inner work, Bill finally got his life completely in balance. That's when he noticed the new loose thread.

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

"No more diapers. Simply lift the lid and go here."

'Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?'

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

Guru.

'Right about here I added a drip coffee maker, with high caffeine premium blend coffee, to the employee break room.'

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

"Show off."

'It's noble of you to want to keep your employees happy, but I can't help by prescribing something for them.'

When Buddha came to nirvana.

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind, and cash-flow."

"Hoarder."

"So you want for your three wishes...world peace, happiness for friends and family...and the weekend off."

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

"First you make a roux."

'Tough day at the office! Somebody broke the water cooler!'

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

Zenboni

Relax.

'There goes JB, still unflappable.'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

'See what happens when meditation isn't supervised?'