Breakfast Table Philosopher T-Shirts

Sugar-coated riboflavin yellow #5 fructose surbosic-carboblutonic flakes.

"Well did he?"

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

"I'd go with French Impressionist. It evokes the burnished golds of autumn leaves and the bittersweet regrets of lost love. It's also on special."

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

"Think about the honey."

"Is this a bad time for our feedback meeting?"

'Do I have to give thanks for all the spinach, or just the bite I'm going to eat?'

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

"Where's my order!? This service is terrible! That stuff will be cold by the time it gets here!! What's the hold-up!?!"

"Before we begin, I think you should all know that I once smoked a reefer in 1935."

Starving Philosophy student grappling with the question of the toast in the machine.

'How do you want your eggs, too hard or too soft?'

Everything opens up as a new day begins.

"Sorry no half portions - at least that's the quantum theory."

"And he paraphrased New York Judge Gerard Lynch when he said our country has an overinflated system of incarceration that is far too punitive, disproportionate in its impact on the poor, exceedingly costly and largely impotent in reducing crime. Anyway, that's what I learned in school today."

'Well - how has everyone wasted time and energy today?'

He's mumbling again! What do you think husbands dream about?

Toast with faces popped up from toaster.

Moral Fruit and Fiber Cereal

'When a cow laughs real hard, does milk come out of her nose?'

"I recommend the businessman's lunch, sir, mammon notwithstanding."

'I don't need that exercise stuff -- I cross the pain threshold just getting out of bed in the morning.'

'I don't know what's wrong with you, you seem to have celibacy on the brain!'

"So this sense of failure stems from the fact that you're not catching any worms despite getting up early?"

"I got the bagel less everythinged, and that has made all the difference."

"At lunchtime Dr. Jones just loves taking union talk with his fellow brothers."

"Yes, Jamie -- you have an insight?"

'We only get an hour for lunch, so your best bet is to brown-bag it.'

"None of this news seems 'fit to print' to me!"

"It's a calling. Someone has to help feed the less fortunate."

"Now dear...remember the sermon on PATIENCE..."

"I just think we should eat a lot more ice cream for dessert to battle global warming."

'Sometimes I think you don't listen to a word I say!'

'The newspaper strike hasn't affected you at all, has it?'