Breakage Commenter Gifts

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

Smoking Area. Oh, I don't smoke. I'm just addicted to ten-minute breaks.

'Right about here I added a drip coffee maker, with high caffeine premium blend coffee, to the employee break room.'

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

"So I'm like, doesn't anyone speak proper English any more?"

"It's bad. He's not even responding to my emails."

'Jenkins, about these coffee breaks of yours...'

"Today we're going to talk about lowering the drawbridge."

'Remember, you said, a change is as good as a holiday!'

'I need a Vacation.'

'Wake up, Jim. It's time for your break.'

"Long time commenter, first time reader. . ."

Beware of the Blog.

"Homework is work, and work without breaks is a federal offense that can be reported to the labor board."

Employee Break Room: Eat, drink, but don't you dare be merry!

"I never want to speak to you again, but I'm find with sex and other non-verbal activities."

"I've hedged against inflation and I've hedged against deflation, but price stability could knock me for a loop."

Men resting.

"My big fat ego has just discovered Twitter!"

"I'm not saying they look anxious to leave, but they're in V-formation."

'You're right, there is no 'i' in team. But there is 'tea', so I'm nipping off for a break right now ...'

Harried worker to colleague: 'It's all about vacation, vacation, vacation!'

"Death takes a personal day."

"Wasting time is an important part of living."

If pharmacists spoke like doctors wrote.

"You' re not listening to a word I'm saying, are you?"

"Don't you have a big test tomorrow?"

The planned obsolescence blues

'I need a break. What can I download that'll take an hour?'

Smoking area. Oh, I don't smoke. I'm just addiction to ten-minute breaks.

"Hey, buddy, can I bum a slip."

'...Send again doesn't look like they got it.'

Phone towers cause cancer tumours