Brand Name Collector Pillows

"You must be terribly proud. It's the finest thing you've done."

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

'We have what might be a very good idea...'

"I'm part of the problem and loving it!"

A man at a cocktail party wears a nametag that reads "Trouble".

'We started wearing name tags to rell who's who, unfortunately we all like the name 'Kevin,!'

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

'Who else have I written for? Ridge Park Avenue, 7th Street, Elm Road, Thornwood Drive...'

Starbucks Siren

"After six weeks of camping out here to observe our operations, the design firm has created a new logo. It's our company's name in blue lower-case letters."

'The trick is to label straight away, otherwise I forget what I have in my larder...'

"Nobody loved little William Poopy-Pants."

'This convention lacks just one thing...name tags.'

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

'Oh Darling, I just love the smell of your new aftershave...'

"Well, well, well! Your parents certainly messed up when they named you, didn't they, Angelo?"

One cow to another: 'We should look at rebranding.'

Your husband will love this cologne. It has that new car smell.

Cinnamon Raisin Swirl Jones.

Crocodile with man logo on polo

'How come it's always me who has his name taken?'

'...call me 'Noisy Ted'.'

"I'm wearing new cologne. I hope Smiley is able to control herself around me today."

"It's a brand name. Honestly, we have nothing to do with Q."

Tombstones with convention name tags

"Could I have a bottle of the Chateau Lafitte '67 but filled with the wine from Tesco 2019."

"I'm having an identity crisis. I can't keep track of whether I'm Nana, Mimi, or Grandma Wolcott."

Back to school expenses.

"Not only am I a 'good boy'...but, according to my owner, I'm also a 'sweetie-weetums.'"