Brain Science Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Sorry, Dr. Schmertzdorf — that was my right brain talking.'

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

"Wait—what did I come into this room to do?"

'My serotonin levels have maxed-out, my brain is awash in glucocoriticoids and, if it weren't for my leveling endogenous opiates, I'd float out that window!'

'I don't care if he does have an I.Q. of 169. I still think he's faking.'

"Do you realize that you and I have it in our power to cause quite a brouhaha?'

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."

Spindle Neurons

'Maybe we have the wrong subject for this brain mapping project.'

Bio Lab. You spliced phoenix DNA into a lemming? What are you trying to make? A perpetual motion machine!

"Most people forget they've had amnesia."

"…And just what do you think you're going to do with your silly death ray once you've finished it?!"

'I'm growing mini human brains from stem cells.'

It's an experiment.

'Catch this!'

The Bride of Finkelstein!

She did only twenty-eight of the thirty-two fouetts in the Black Swan pas de deux . . . or are my eyes deceiving me?

"Dopamine Casino. Gambling that makes you feel like gambling."

'You knew I was a mad scientist when you married me!'

X-RAY

"OSHA is going to hear about this!"

'I'm not saying I won't eat left-brained people's brains, but I prefer right.'

Uncle Mort, have you been playing with your home genetic engineering kit again? Guilty. I was trying to clone my own DNA. For laughs, I mixed up my genes with compost. Mixed up? Technically, cross-bred. Trump is a meathead! Well, you're a vegetable.

Caricature of Noam Chomsky

Frankenfish

'You know creativity involves a high tolerance for failure, don't you?'

'The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your actions.'

'Giving you eternal life was a hard enough problem! Don't expect me to know how to save enough for it, too!'

"He, Igor? Who are we to play God with its gender pronouns?"

Professor...what are you doing?

"We were just wondering if you were edible."

Brains

'But how does it feel to misunderstand how you might think about not knowing what to believe?'

"About these experiements of yours into genetic cloning, Bond" boomed the Headmaster, "They must cease immediately"