Boredom Specialist Gifts

Summer break has left you with too much time on your hands. One of your eyelashes moved.

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

'That last meeting was a complete turn-off.'

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

The Adventures of God

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

I know you're bored but you better not be doing that rain dance again!

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

Tic-tac-toe

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

Chairmen of the Bored

'I'm tired of playing 'Rock, rock rock'.'

"This piece resembles my subconscious desire to draw spirals on a big piece of paper."

Mitch realizes he was alive at noon.

The Sleeping Congregation.

"I've had enough of watching grass grow. What's on the Paint Drying Channel?"

"Welcome back to the We Were Bored and Had Nothing Else To Do podcast."

'Bored?'

"I don't know, what do you want to do today?"

"...Looks like nothing but snow on TV tonight..."

"My life must really be boring. I asked the guy why he hacked into my social media and he replied that reading it helps him get to sleep a night."

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

"Do your thing, Phil...lull them into submission."

Quarantine: Day Quinty-Neven

"Time passes much more slowly in the other dimension, so take these sudokus."

'Would you mind terribly taking up some other sport besides long-distance running?'

'Would the person who's inhaling the very life out of this meeting please stop it right now?'

Book on Thumb Twiddling

"Legally, I have the right to talk as slowly and boringly about all your options as I want."

"Oxygen masks. When a meeting gets so boring as to be life-threatening, they automatically drop down!"

Margaret got tired of waiting for her ‘slow-brew' tea.

"Can we fast forward through the 7th inning stretch?"

Do not resuscitate.