Bore-buster Gifts

'I never get a good night's sleep. Thank God for these office meetings!'

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

I'm not making enough money to like you.

Warning that Inflationary Policies Could Lead to Crash on Wall St

Basketball Tourney. Ernie, you're crushing everybody in the office basketball pool! You've picked the winner of every game so far! It's amazing because you don't know a thing about basketball. For you, picking the winner of every tournament game is like correctly guessing a coin flip sixty seven times in a row! No, I have a system! It seems everybody has an opinion about the tourney so I listened to what my investment advisor thought about the teams. And with his record of picking winners

Joe hasn't been the same since training for that new biathlon--bronco busting and sumo wrestling.

'This has to be the longest course I've ever played!' (Sign with Gas/Food/Lodging Next Tee)

"Where do you come up with your rationalizations for not writing?"

"The thing of it is I don't even fish!"

'I hate to see you work during your lunch hour, so do me a favor and close your door.'

Waiter, there are tiny bubbles rising to the surface of my clam chowder. Conclusion" there's a flatulent fly in my soup. ? ?

'Thrower here has always been one to push the envelope.'

The housing market begins to deflate.

Nitrogen Emissions

"What part of this don't you understand?"

Holy Water and Ice Blocks

'I'm sensing you may still have some boundary issues.'

"Please don't tell me they're making broth."

"That's not a haboob. It's Ed trying to get his ball out of a bunker."

Man Carrying Big Burden

'Evidence is that increased extreme weather is due to climate change.'

"Terrible, I couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard I tried."

The Evolution of fish

"I've developed a chemical that causes short term memory loss."

"Why do you think we need a humidifier?"

'We rolled your account over last week, Sir, and now we can't find it.'

"Seriously, you don't know how to float?"

'I'm sorry about your account, sir - The 'Dollar Bubble' burst.'

"Problems are only as real as you imagine them to be."

"No, you come in on four."

"First, I want to give you an overview of what I will tell you over and over again during the entire presentation."

"Mr. Harlow, let me give you a piece of advice: Everything is a bubble."

"He's stopped waiting for Brexit and moved on with his life."

For Timely Filing

"We already demolished that!"