Bookish Wizards Gifts

The Great Banzinni discovers the oldest trick in the book.

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

You do know it's Harry Potter who's real and JK Rowling is just one of his spells?

Late BroomStick

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

'I have a feeling we are not in Kansas anymore.'

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

"I've decided to add a little magic, so, everyone, say hello to my little friend."

Library door sign says, 'We have encyclopedias ... the original Facebook!'

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

Updated Stories. The Wicked Witch Of The West Tries A New Tactic To Get The Ruby Slippers. Security Checkpoint. Remove your shoes, please.

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

"I don't know, it's just the whole Dark Ages thing. It's got me down."

"This year the endowed chair will go to whomever pulls the sword from the stone."

Emma Watson

Meet The Author's Wife. The author is too surly to talk.

'Can you redo this manuscript, John, and make it less stupid?'

"Oh well, I'm off the see the orthopedist."

Scarecrow chasing Igor with a brain

"Come with us to see the wizard. He can find you a brain!"

"CBD… oil… CBD… oil…"

"Right! It's a heart op, neurosurgery and counselling. And I'll have the Wiz"

'Why don't we try a renegotiated buyout offer before we go with the Plague of Rabid Bats thing.'

'What I meant by 'quark' in 'Finnegans Wake' was a hypothetical particle with a fractional electric charge.

Books. Harry Potter and the Huge Pile of Royalties.

'It's exploded! The wizard warned him to break it in gently.'

'I've never met such a heartless, gutless and brainless board of directors!'

"The magic's still there, but the sex is terrible."

"After all these years, I'm sure of only one thing: when I heat the liquid, it boils."

"The tests came back positive. You're H2O intolerant."

Blockbuster book adaptations gone wrong.

'You can be replaced by Harry Potter, you know!'

'Hmm, wrong bottle. I guess THIS one must've been the Elixir of Death...'

"Some of us think he's a sales magician."

"I need some help to write my self-help book..."