Bookish Foodie T-Shirts

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

'Hard to follow...'

Never write a sonnet on an empty stomach

"Geoffrey's seasonal. I'm regional."

Cook in the cookery section.

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"You grab the food—I'll grab the wine."

"Bill just does celebrity cook-books these days, that's where the real money is."

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

Avocado Timeline

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways … Open Mike Night Presents Sadie Cohen. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my ladle can reach … When feeling hungry for the crunch of crouton and ideal lettuce. I love thee to the level of every day's most quiet need ... by cheesy bread and chicken wing. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I eat of thee freely, and then, at four, 'tis goodnight. O Sizzler salad bar, how do I love thee? I'm hungry.

'I've got another loose tooth - It's not your cooking is it mum?'

Non-wall St merger: Mom's Home Cooking...Pop's Cafe!

Empty landscape containing food and stationery.

'The crepes of wrath.' 'Joad's mobile pancake store.'

"Sorry no half portions - at least that's the quantum theory."

Barbecue Fetch

"Is anyone enjoying anything?"

"When a man is tired of pasta, sir, he is tired of life. Dr. Johnson."

'Would that be rare, or medium rare?'

Alternative Dickens: Oliver, having received more, requests a doggy bag.

"With any entrée, you get unlimited access to the trough."

Scene from an early draft of Moby Dick

Bestsellers have sold so well there are none at all on the shelves.

'She's on the rotation diet. Every time I turn around she's eating something.'

'Your check? Certainly,sir -- would you like it itemized?'

Emeril Lagasse

Isaac Newton discovered gravity and his neighbour Wilbus discovered Apple Sauce.

"Glad I had a pretzel before leaving the house; I'd hate to drink all that on an empty stomach."

Major Poets, Minor Poets, Free Agents.

"Mmm....say, cookie! What's this garbage you're feeding us?"