Book Conjurer Gifts

'I've forgotten the author and title - do you read minds?'

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'Needs salt!'

Bright Idea

"So start throwing together about 10 novels a week and bring them in on Wednesdays."

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

A woman drawing birds makes them fly around the room.

Artist's Equipment Comes To Life

Ghostbasters 3

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

Witch's Brew.

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

'You can fill your teddy bear with stuffing or with a demonic spirit summoned from the nether regions.'

"Can you rewrite this in 3-D?"

Oil Spill: 'Oh dear! That was the last of our extra virgin.'

The Thinker and Creative Thinker.

"I'm writing a memoir. It's mostly recipes."

"You think you're so damn Cordon Bleu!"

'There's been an update. Instead of abracadabra, it's option/control key.'

"Don't hold back on the toad legs now - I'm through with Nouvelle Cuisine!"

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

"Try and push the eye of newt and wing of bat casserole."

"Anyone having a 'Eureka!' moment?"

My Cauldron Rules

You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.

'And Fenwick, those pesky third quarter stats? Don't tweak 'em �' torque 'em!'

'This is taking forever. We should've just microwaved it.'

'I wish you'd cook dinner!'

"She works best in hex mode."

Moments Later, David Blaine Would Be Crushed Into Nothingness.

'Life! Give my conversation liiiife!'

"I've taught him to do tricks, he wants you to pick a card."

'It's so cool we have another test today.'

"Don't write it!"

"I have to know how it's done."