Book Collectors T-Shirts

At Ireland's oldst and most respected school of dance, Mrs O'Hara made a terrible discovery... (Book entitled 'The book of Irish dancing vol. 2 - How to incorporate the arms')

Henry I of England

'Well, it's official. The entire catalogue has to be dumbed down again!'

Foolproof plans (that really work)

Good vision? Save Money - Tiny Type Books.

'Joyce Kilmer is a bore - give me 'Desire Under the Elms' any day!'

Spent it all on self-help books.

'Food additives you'd want to avoid - crayons, digital watch, first edition of 'Tale of Two Cities'.

"I knew that book would come in useful one day"

"How come they remember every word of any pop song but not a single line of poetry?"

Divine Desk Bins

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Meet The Author"

"Tonight! Author book signing." "Develop your inner raging bitch."

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

Rare Books

Woman blowing dust off book 'Desert Romance'

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

Characters jumping out of a book.

Great British Eccentrics.

Books: The Wit and Wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge

Shop struggles to sell books about recession: '90 per cent off on all credit crunch books' (Titles incluude: Beat the Crunch! Who's to Blame? We're all Doomed!)