Bonus Boaster Gifts

The ground cracking beneath a banker's feet because his bonus is so big and heavy.

"It drives me MAD when people whine about the amount top management get paid. . ."

"I've decided to step down as CEO so I can spend more time with my money."

The Evolution of the Bonus

'Thanks to the huge bonus, I find myself forced to admire you.'

'We believe in using performance-enhancing drugs here.. they're called bonuses.'

We need to put more money into Lithuanian sardine futures...I think that warrants bonuses all around!

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"I thought about looking for work in England, but I hear they're capping bonuses."

'Ready for your bonus, Bob?'

'But the good news is, I still get a big bonus.'

'I had a great year and I wasn't even trying.'

'If congress regulates obscene bonuses, isn't that a violation of the first amendment?'

'Remember Nitro, keep the engine running and once we've bagged the bonus cheques you floor the peddle.'

'I chose here since heaven won't allow you to take your bonus and golden parachute with you.'

"At bonus time, just don't forget where you get your intellectual property."

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

'This potion will get you promoted but I can't guarantee a bonus.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

We don't think your 12 million dollar bonus is obscene. We think it's 12 million little ways to say 'I love you.'

"No Jenkins, that's NOT a sales graph - it's my salary increase."

Loose change fund: 'You get to keep whatever you can grab with one hand.'

'$800,000 per year? Is that with or without an incentive bonus?'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

'You're addicted to big bonuses. But the good news is there's a patch to treat that.'

"You've been vital to our great year. Your bonus is whatever you can carry out by midnight."

"Will my bonus look big in this?"

'He earns less than the Prime Minister...'

Company Performance - Bonus Scheme

'We're with you half way, sir. We'll return our government bailout if we can keep our executive bonuses.'

'I'd like a job where I'm hated for having obscene amounts of money.'

"Your son is a bus driver? Well, my Andy goes to university..."

What's a CEO's motivation?

"If I don't get a bonus from my bank, I'll quit and flip burgers!"

'My Christmas bonus.'