Bond Enhancer Gifts

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

Networking

Father and son with matching beer crates.

'Don't mind him. He gets this wa every time they start talking about the inverse relationship between bond yields and prices.'

(Stocks) (Bonds) (Off Wall St.)

"Mom wants us to spend 'Quality time' together, so don't blame me."

'After looking over your portfolio, I don't think 'enough' will be enough.'

'Thanks for the order, Mr Barnes and I want you to think of me as your friend.'

'I handle commodities and Dietrich here specialises in stocks and bonds.'

How to Polish Up Your Resume. Remember, you don't want to polish it to the point you can actually see yourself in it.

"What do you have that's bigger than 'king'?"

"Chasing Investment Yield for Fitness & Profit"

"Sorry, I can't explain why, when interest rates rise, bond prices fall."

"I want to switch all my municipal bonds into stocks, my stocks into T-bill and my T-bills into municipal bonds."

"I know you were a car salesman before becoming a bond trader, but we sell bonds in the secondary market, not 'used bonds'."

'It's all downhill from here.'

"If you hadn't lost everything, I would recommend that you buy now."

"Which one's mine?!"

"My computer still won't work. It must still hold a grudge from when I punched it in frustration."

"Our training program was too successful. Twenty employees used their new skills to leave the company for better jobs."

"Supersize me."

Brenda tests to see if Karl can truly handle the low points of living together.

Test dummies holding 'Kama Sutra For Dummies' manual.

"The gentleman opposite would like to buy you more time."

"Emanaditas...grilled cheese sandwich...a mango... Oh yeah! And ice! Last time I sent a care package to my brother in Iraq, he said it was all spoiled."

"How would you like to dabble in some very high quality junk bonds?"

Investments: Would you be interested in some big, fat Greek high-yield bonds?

'I just retired from politics to spend more time with my children -- are you my children?'

'I'm just here for your Detroit muni bonds.'

Botox injections

Sex Shop

Mike has second thoughts about getting in touch with his feminine side.

Vinnie's Tanning Salon.

'It's my wife's reminder to put the toilet seat down.'

"Give a man a fish, and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you no longer own him."