Bog Enthusiast Gifts

'Just because no one visits your peat bog blog, doesn't mean you're a bad person.'

"Mind the whale, dear."

'Stop complaining woman, you wanted a boating holiday!'

'Slip Ahoy!'

Fish snorkling above water.

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

"With strong winds battering the country, the Met Office have issued an amber wig wearers warning."

Whale Shark Thoughts...

"Just what is a runcible spoon?"

"You seem to be balancing your workload well."

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

Baby with straw to eat out of bib.

'That's nothing...I've been told my wig takes fifteen years off me.'

Making fun of Starfish.

I see you caught the fish, but the boat got away!

"Productivity may be up but I miss seeing people miserable."

'When I said attached the anchor to something heavy I didn't mean your Uncle Barry!'

"Admit it, you're lost!"

'Please restore all toupees to upright position.'

"Honey who needs a man when you've got... Rhythm!"

Thames Pizza

'I think he wants you to play ball!'

"Don't bother going that way: They've installed shark nets..."

'... and make it look like an accident.'

"I love it when you quote my blog back to me."

'I need to buy some gas, but I forgot my wallet. Do you have $18,000 on you?'

"Every year I lay a thousand eggs. Mother's Day rolls around, not a single card."

Proof you've made it Loud Annoying The voices raised against you

"Gladys, look! My kids made me a card for Mother's Day!"

'Someday I hope he grows up into a sports bottle...just like his father.'

Pianist being pelted with tomatoes.

"I was so shy I hid to sound her out. When the echo came back, she sounded really good looking, and the rest, is history..."

"1 pinch of salt, 3 pinches of baking soda...oh dear, a cup of flour? How many pinches is that?"

'When an outboard goes overboard'