Body Transformation Buff Gifts

'Your plastic surgery went great...you look terrific!'

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

Muscles

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

"I hate it when the damned things decide they need to get out and burn off some calories."

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

'We're looking for athletic people.'

7 brownies worth of exercise.

Keep Fit.

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

Gene Therapy

'Hey, Bob, can you get this itch on my chin? It's driving me nuts.'

"Went with the hair plugs I see."

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

'It's caused by doing too many wrist curls, overindulging in spinach and... Excuse me. Everyone in here - stat - if you want to see an actual case of 'Popeye Syndrome'!'

'You mean that I have to carry them to my car?'

"Some genetic engineers we turned out to be!"

Motivation to Keep Fit.

Pollyanna, the Hamster

'Hey look I got a free newspaper with my wallchart of north sea molluscs aand DVD of elbow stretching excercises.'

"We supply the exercise and nutrition program, but it's up to you to supply the narcissism."

A tailor measuring a large man

'Id like to see you in two weeks. Try not to eat during that time.'

Weight Gain Denial

Content Creator

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

'All I can say is my wife worked out every day when she was pregnant.'

"My diet book is outselling yours."

'Since I got this exercise ball, my abs have gotten into the best shape they've ever been!'

'You have the body of a 22 year old man, providing your birthday is February 29th.'

"Sosa's great, but McGwire is my hero."

'I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I had the whitest teeth!'

Dolphin wins the swimming competition.