Body Acceptance Advocate Pillows

"In order to be a better mirror of society, we feel parliament should have more overweight female members with a wardrobe deficiency."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

Critisize your weight.

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

"Privates Beach"

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

Breast Height Chart

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

'I gotta lose some weight.'

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

"I really didn't have a weight problem until they invented skinny jeans."

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"When you're healed, I'm going to wear it so I can't see what I weigh."

Aging Problems

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

Hips may appear larger than they actually are.

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

In the not too distant future... "It's a tribal butterfly tramp stamp, honey. Same as yours."

'Good grief! Who CARES where our tails begin?'

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

Victoria's secret lovers: Barry, Al, Percy.

Fat fairy

Girl's weight issues.

Scales

"I'm pretty sure the middle-aged upper-arm jiggle is the one thing there's not a niche market for."

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

"I can't have anything that's a food."