Boat Collector T-Shirts

'Inflatable boat Fred!'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

'It's true what they say, you really can hear the sea in these things!'

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

'It seats two comfortably.'

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'He's been there ever since he ate the parrot!'

'I think it's time we came to grips with our addiction to buying kayaks.'

'You don't have the muscles to buy a muscle car, dear.'

'God's speed.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'I'm afraid you'll have to buy a car, sir -- Braxton, here, accidentally sold your car to somebody else.'

'Hi, I'm looking for something small and portable!'

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"There it is...the car of my dreams! It's the perfect match! The seat...the steering wheel...they just call my name! I'm not leaving here without it!"

"...and it comes with sat-nav, which as you can see the previous owner used all the time."

Soap recovery Ship in bath

"I wonder what this was for."

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

Acme Flyswatters.

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

Sailing enthusiast brings his hobby to his office.

'But, honey, the girl in the bikini only adds to the awesomeness of my car.'

'It has ten speeds but only one has been used.'