Boardroom Magician Gifts

Since this is a smoke-free building, we'll have to fool the shareholders with mirrors alone.

"So, unless someone can solve this company's problems with some sort of magic wand or something; I'll have no choice but to lay you all off!"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

'And I'm happy to say, that since the merger...'

Team Leader

"My report to the board was perfect. They did not understand a word of it and now think I'm smarter than them."

Businessman with in and out boxes marked: 'Hocus' and 'Pocus'

"'Meetingpalooza' sounded better in the brochure."

Smoke and mirrors.

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

'You can't put him out to pasture - he owns the pasture!'

'Maybe you should reconsider those place cards, Ms Harris?' (Negotiation talks/Good Guys/Bad Guys)

"And I'm sure no one will mind if we fold a few clothes while we talk."

Inkwell Genie.

"I'm not only a Guardian Angel, I'm also an expert at turnarounds."

"For my next trick, I shall turn four consecutive quarters of losses into a positive outlook going forward."

'I've chosen you for fresh, new ideas.'

'I think I'm decisive. Can I get back to you on that?'

'In keeping with the team approach, we've traded you for two middle managers to be named later.'

Daimler, ChryslerSturm and Drang meeting

'I brought Simmons here on board to use his powers of levitation on our customer intelligence.'

"Geoffrey always was a bit of a loose cannon.."

'You may have three mergers.'

"In preparation for his appearance before the foundation board, Rodney fine-tunes his song and dance."

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."

'Does anyone have a question?'

"It got so bad that had to bring Jones in to turn things around."

'This potion will get you promoted but I can't guarantee a bonus.'

'Whoever wants my job must lift the sword from the stone.'

"I need to take a call. Argue amongst yourselves."

'It's the next big thing, but I can't fit it through the door.'

"Things are getting desperate...we have to do something!"

'I realize I'm making a huge salary... but I gotta be me.'

Can you do it so my eyes follow everyone around the boardroom?